As a coach, I get a lot of questions from
my clients who want to expand their awareness and ability to love
unconditionally. How can I learn to love “this” or “that” about myself? How can
I love someone who has hurt me? How can I love people who do horrible things to
others? How can I learn to love unconditionally? The world is such a horrible
place, they might say, how is it possible to love everyone and everything?
There is a big difference between loving
someone and supporting their behavior. You will always love your child, but you
will not allow them to physically hurt you. This is where many get stuck,
because their reason for holding back love is almost always connected with a
behavior that someone has demonstrated in the past.
It’s also sometimes confusing to see the
difference between love and forgiveness. You can love your child, husband etc,
but you might not be able to forgive them for what they did that has hurt you. This
creates a conflict within people because we are innately programmed to be
unconditional love.
When I talk about these things with my
clients, we always end up focusing on them, not the doer or the other person,
but my client. Because the emotional vibration they are sending out to the
Universe, determines their reaction to their environment.
Think about this for a minute. Your
environment presents you with a scenario. Afterwards, you, the person standing
next to you and a third person unknown to you are asked to describe the
scenario. You will all have different stories to tell, based on your
background, beliefs and emotional wellbeing.
So how does this relate to my topic,
unconditional love?
The energetic vibration that you emit from
your being is based on your thought pattern, your subconscious mind, your
emotions, your cellular memory, your ”programming” if you will. Dr. David R. Hawkins,
describes in his book, Power vs Force, the energetic scale of human emotion.
The lowest of all the energies we can emit are shame, guilt, fear and the
like. Unconditional love however, sits
at the very top of the scale, up there with joy, peace and enlightenment.
What most people fail to recognize is that
we are responsible for the energy that we “put out there” all of the time
because that energy will influence other people. A person who is contemplating
committing a crime, will “get permission” to do so if there are enough low vibrational
frequencies around! Those frequencies come from the rest of us….
So imagine the difference in your
experiences and your reactions to your environment when you are emitting such
high vibrations from your being rather than low vibrations such as shame and
guilt. When you start clearing out your subconscious mind from guilt, shame,
anger and fear, and you replace your limiting beliefs with optimism, love,
happiness, understanding and forgiveness to name a few, the energy from you
will differ tremendously and you will have done your part in eliminating
violence, crime and negative behavior on a much larger, worldly scale than you
can imagine. This will in turn, give more people the “permission” to raise
their vibration as well and give them more opportunities to show positive acts
of love and kindness to another.
How can you start loving yourself? It’s
first and foremost a decision you make. Then you will most likely have to
change some of your thoughts, subconscious beliefs and actions or let go of old
grief, shame, memories and heartache. For this I use Emotional Freedom
Techniques, mindfulness and talk therapy with my clients, but there are
countless of other methods that also work very well. In the talk therapy I
explain how your experiences in the past are affecting you today. You will
understand why certain things keep appearing in your life. The focus is on you
and how to change your experiences.
The more we are able to clear from our
subconscious mind and programming, the more love we start feeling towards
ourselves. The more love we feel towards ourselves the more love we feel
towards others. The more we feel towards others the more we are contributing
towards love, peace and kindness in this world.
I believe it’s our purpose here to remember
that we are beings of unconditional love. We will learn to love ourselves as
well as others. We are all connected and we must learn to be responsible for
the energetic vibration we allow ourselves to contribute to the whole.
Namaste
Too read about my 11 month long programme
“Learn to love yourself” see
http://www.serenityEFT.com
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